In today’s paper was an article about the failure of our court system, with people spending many years, hundreds of thousands of dollars, and creating terrible stress. What an unnecessary and terrible situation. It doesn’t have to be like that!
Litigation and court should be reserved for the most difficult cases only. Most people can stay out of the battle where they have to fight each other to get their way.
When people learn that court is not about righting wrongs, and that judges and magistrates are really about applying the letter of the law, then they may realise that it is an extremely risky venture, which costs a fortune, causes unbelievable stress and can take years.
Those who have been in the system will tell you that if they knew at the start, what they know now, that they would never have gone anywhere near it.
There is a much better way that costs a fraction of litigation and court.
Although most people believe that their situation is unsuitable, that the other person is way too unreasonable, that they are too bitter and emotional, Family Dispute Resolution (FDR) and Mediation do work.
A co-model of mediation (or FDR) where 2 mediators – a male and a female, work together as a team with parents or divorcing couples, in a gender balanced procedurally fair process that really helps them to work together without fear of bias. As professionals in helping families we are able to help calm the situation, help parties to find common ground, staying focused on the best interests of their children, rather than how to destroy each other. The results are far better because the process has allowed them to express their needs, understand each other better and to come to robust agreements that both (or all) can truly live with.
Parties don’t have to be friends later, but they will always be parents, and we can help them to find that level of collaboration.
The cost of mediation and FDR are a small fraction of litigation and divorce, and it usually takes just a week or 2 from enquiry to agreement.